Monthly Archives: November 2013

“9 OF…”

“Opening minds and angravating liberals since 2001”

“I am a guardian of freedom and the American way of life.”

Genesis 3:19


My Friends and Fellow Goldschlagers:


I hope you and your all had a wonderful and blessed Thanksgiving.  Trust you all took stock of what we have, what we had and what we have to do to get it back.   On a related note a very Happy Hanukkah to my Jewish friends!  Chag sameach and shalom!

Ok, as mentioned last time out that there were two very major developments on our liberty, safety and/or sovereignty perpetrated against us by this cartel of anti-Americanism.

Truly I do not know which is worse: Dingy Harry the ELF having been told to eliminate the filibuster for judicial appointments so Biff can stack the courts or the selling out to the Iranians.  Show of hands, which one first…

OK, it was close, but we will look at the Iranian question first.

Proving again that he serves no earthly use John “WTLF” Kerry has amplified the fact that his sole redeeming value is to make JoeBama look slightly less the buffoon and incrementally more qualified for something.

(I can only surmise that JoeBama has delusions of adequacy and may be considering a run in 2016.  By making the rest of Biff’s Bizarro Band of Banditos look less than competent JoeBama looks better by comparison.)

Kerry has been lauded by his overseer as being a brilliant negotiator!  After looking at all that he got for what he gave up it would be if we surrendered to the Japs after Hiroshimaand Nagasaki

“Okay, you destroy our cities!  We give you one chance to surrender! WHAT?  You ARE going to surrender?  Hmmm.. In that case you must throw in Canada or you will force us to have more of our cities blown up!”

Does that make any sense at all?  Of course not, but that is the standard operating procedure for his Maladministration.

We have not seen such feckless “negotiating” since the war criminal Henry Kissinger.  He got us to the peace talks in Paris and after debating for months on the size and shape of the negotiating table immediately bent himself over it for the pleasure of the Cong.

“Zo, ve vill agrrrrree to leaf Wiet Nam no later zan 30 April 1975!  You vill act nicely and zat will be zat.  “Verstehen?

And with the timetable set, the Viet Cong and the NVA sat by and then Quang Tri fell, then Tam Ky, then Da Nang and so on an so forth as Saigon is encircled, Tan Son Nhut airbase is attacked and on 30 April, the unforgettable images of people storming the US Embassy in Saigon as chopper after chopper left until the final one with the last 10 Marines lifted off.

Kissinger gave away the ranch and got nothing in a return except a butt kicking and a promise.  The promise was broken and we did nothing, we did not even have the common courtesy to have a hissy fit.

WTLF did not get even that.

In order for all that nothing at all, he promised to give the Iranians access to a lot of their own hard cash, a reduction on other trade restrictions, permission to expand their “nuclear power” experimentation and I think a first round draft pick in the 2014 NFL draft.

And all we have to do is nothing.

That is right.

 We are allowed to “inspect” the Iranian nuke facilities.  No, not all of them you silly goose, just the ones they SAID we can inspect, not the ones where they are creating more fissionable material, enriching plutonium or the like. No, we might find something and then Biff will be very cross, stamp his feet and start a diversionary scandal.

 No, we got nothing, not a sausage, not sweet fanny annie.

 You know there are three American citizens being held in Iran?  One now has the dubious honor of being the longest held hostage in US history, 2458 days as I send this out.  Another is a Christian minister who started a number of schools and he is in deep stuff as is the last in the trio.

Do you think that idiot WTLF might at least suggest that as long as we are again bending over on the world stage that the Muzzies might, at the very, least release the three American citizens?(No! We can’t do that!  We may have to give them more, especially when they refuse!)

No, that would take a set, a very small set, but a set he is lacking. 

But the day AFTER the agreeing to let the fox into to the henhouse, the Whi’te House released information that they “respectfully” asked the Iranians to release our fellow citizens. You know, for the “holidays.”

Gee, is it Ramadan already?

I am good with my ciphers but even I canNOT count the “mistakes” which were made in this clusterfluke.  First off, you negotiate BEFORE you agree to dropping yer drawers.  Second, and with profound respect to my Jewish friends, this is considered CHRISTmas time. It is not Lincoln’s Birthday or other holiday.

(Then again we know it is CHRISTmas and so does Biff.  What is he doing for CHRISTmas this year?  Well, he is CLOSING the United States Embassy in Vatican City.  Why are they doing that?  They are citing that old standby lie: “security issues.”  Yes!  The Popemobile might run over someone!  It is not safe like our consulate in, say, BENGHAZI!  As an American, a CHRISTian and a Catholic I am appalled and incensed over this slap across the face of all good people.)

As bad as all that is there is more… less, really, if you are keeping score for the home team.

I do not know for sure how much Biff or WTLF discussed with our Israeli friends, if we can still call them that as they certainly canNOT rely on us.  But for some reason I think either not a lot, not at all, or, at best, not everything.

(Of course NOW it is being “revealed” that there were “talks” with Israel beforehand.  And I guess, if you like those talks, you can keep those talks.  Period.)

Per Bibi (who I would vote for were he able to run here) it seems the Israelis are not that happy, to put it mildly.   They are not in love with the idea if a nuclear Iran, the same country that has threatened over the years to blow Israel off of the map.

To add insult to injury, though the events maybe out of order, on the one hand, you have Bibi popping a gasket and that fatuous idjit WTLF slurring (paraphrasing) “We are on the same page as Israel, there is ‘no daylight’ between our positions.”

That apparently came as a surprise to Bibi and the only daylight I can think of is between WTLF’s ears.

So far, the home-boy team seems to be batting zero.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, the President of the Islamic Republic of Iran, Hassan Rouhani, is doing the Muzzi version of spiking the football.

The “Teheran Times” (who I prolly trust more than the New York Times”) had as their headline the other day “WE WON!”

I am sure Hank Rouhani (Hmmm????) is thinking: “Lessee… we have had sanctions imposed on us for over thirty years, we have been involved in all kinds of nasty business, we are all but flaunting our nuclear plans, we have refused to give one inch and every time we refuse their overtures they come back with more concessions.  There must be a trick so we will stay low and act cool!”

No, he gets out on his soap (just kidding) box atop the tallest minaret and bellows “WE WON!”

He knows we are not going to do anything, take anything back or demand more access.  He knows we are a pitiful helpless giant.

What is prolly the most confusing is the politics.  After all, WTLF, a Liberal, acted like the Republicrats in the Brothel of Representatives when putting bill after bill to the Senate of the Brothel only to be rebuked then comeback with fewer demands.

So, bet your last dollar on this:  This “deal” with the Islamic Republic of Iran will pay negative dividends and may lead us into a very ugly, dangerous and deadly confrontation in that part of the world.

Faced with two horrific tragedies to America, what do you think Biff did? 

Did he step in and demand more concessions from the Iranians?  Did he scold Dingy Harry the ELF for his throwing almost two and a quarter centuries of history and tradition of conducting business in the upper house if the Brothel?

No, don’t be silly…. The muslim Valerie Jarrett is prolly calling the shots with the deal with her home boys. (Yes, the Senior Advisor to the president was BORN in Iran.)  Biff is most likely the force behind Dingy yet again shredding the threatening our freedoms and ways of life.

So, what did he do?

When the going gets tough, the tough get going.

However, when the going gets tough, the cowards get campaigning.

Just like after Benghazi, with the desecrated bodies still warm when Biff went to Las Vegas for some campaign cash, again, he legs out to the Left Coast for more campaigning, more cash and more set-up questions.

For all of you who voted for this pretendadent, I hope you are happy and proud.

More to come…


“8 OF…”

“Opening minds and angravating liberals since 2001”

“I am a guardian of freedom and the American way of life.”

Genesis 3:19


My Friends and Fellow Goldielocks:

Just in case you though the last issue was an anomaly or that St. Oprah’s horrid and racist statements were accidental, allow me to posit the following.

(SALADBAR:  And in a state of schadenfreude, I have learned that on St. Oprah’s web page, the main topic of discussion is her racism, and none of it is in her defense.)

Let’s consider all the good that Biff has done for the Country, gee, that took no time at all.  When you consider all the evil, hurt, harm and damage he has done, well, you are talking about the collected works of the FISH over the past… well, since he showed up on the scene.

So, when his “signature” piece of pelosi, I mean legislation, turns out to work worse than a square bowling ball and less popular than a venereal disease, something had to be done!

His originally vaunted and promoted “OBAMACARE” as it was referred in all the media has been rebranded to the technical name, the “Affordable Care Act”, just like it is written on the sides of the cars that are out there “monitoring” it.  I call bravo sierra and insist he not be so modest and we call it “OBAMA’s OBAMACARE.”  Yeah, YOU  built that!

Now, when you are up to your butt in alligators, you forget that your primary objective was to drain the swamp. Same here, and those alligators are biting their collected backs.

Those alligators have names: “Fast and Furious”, “Benghazi” and so on and so forth.  In fact there are about two dozen of those critters out there. And each time a new critter comes up and snaps, for some reason the most recent alligator seems to go back underwater.

Biff was counting on OBAMA’S OBAMACARE to be the whitewash for all the scandalous graffiti and would be seen the hero.

Aw, geez, it just did not turn out that way.

OBAMA’S OBAMACARE is a disaster and it is so bad that his Liberal slaves in both houses of the Brothel are shying away from it and the media is not only covering up for him but saying that the dictator has no clothes.

(LOOOONG SIDEBAR:    Remember when one of the alleged purposes of OBAMA’S OBAMACARE was to get coverage for the uninsured?  Is it now funny that when the dust settles that there will be LESS people with health care?  I am not going to expose all the other lies about OBAMA’S OBAMACARE, I just do not have that much time and I have already hit the high points in previous FISHIES.  Remember when the Republicans shut down the gov’t recently?  Me neither.  But I do recall that the Liberals did.  Do you remember that Biff was pissing and moaning that 800,000 poor nonessential gov’t employees were being furloughed? [And if they are nonessential and we did without them for a few weeks, why are they back?]  We heard that lie over and over and over again.  Biff was trying to put lipstick on a human face of the Democrat caused shutdown.  But, oppps, it was not 800,000 people sent home, it was roughly half of that.  And they ALL got paid for staying home. It was like a staged car accident to defraud GEICO or State Farm.  Stalin famously said “One death is a tragedy, a million deaths is a statistic.”  In Biff’s Bizarro world 800,000, ooopps 400,000, nonessential federal employees who get a few weeks off from work and get paid for that time off is a tragedy, but – so far -5,000,000 fewer insured is a mere statistic.  And that is nowhere near the final toll of uninsured. Oh, in case you wonder why I mention all this, it is for two reasons: The shutdown was, like everything else, a distraction and the lies proffered just increase every time anyone from the West Wing speaks.  But I repeat myself.)

This puts St. Oprah’s hate filled racist interview in some context.  I firmly believe that she meant what she said, she has exposed her racism more frequently since she went off the air and the White Wimmens are no longer making her richer.

 But all these things are window dressings, cover-ups, distractions and the like.  Virtually every new lie, canard and scandal is built on caused by or used to obfuscate the last.

As I have said too many times, this Maladministration are like magicians.  They are making us watch their left hand while their other left hand is screwing us or stealing our liberties and freedoms.  Like the man behind to the curtain we are admonished not to watch too closely or question at all why which levers are being pulled by whom.

In a spin on what Rahmbo Emanuel said about not letting a good crisis going to waste, sometimes crises must be invented to have us take our collective eye off of the ball.

Part and parcel of this is that we become immune to the machinations of this group.  Like prisoners of war, we have been beaten so many times we have come to expect the next beating.  We have been lied to so often and have been made aware of so many scandals and lies that they almost have lost their meaning and effect.



But like a junkies fix when drug wears off, they head back to the dealer for another piece of crock.  (Not a typo.)

In the past week what good news has come down the pike?


Well, other than the fact that less people than ever before trust or believe Biff and do not see him as an effective leader.  And THAT came from CNN…. So, you can imagine how bad it REALLY is.

But in the past week you have St. Oprah spewing her hate and venom, you have the Upper House of the Brothel jettisoning the filibuster, WTLF Kerry seeing his soul and our safety to the Iranians but while Rome burns, Nero is out raising money for the Socialist Party election coffers.

Truly, pick a job, ANY job, I do not care which or what job.  If YOU did your job as poorly and as cavalierly as does this chump, you would have been fired years ago!

So, the series continues with an overlap thanks to St. Oprah.  We will address some of that discussed here in detail in following issues.


With all that said, please understand that we STILL live in the greatest Country in the world.  Of course, that is food for another FISH as it speaks to how screwed up the world is.   We used to be the huge, powerful Superpower competing with other superpowers to maintain peace and freedom. 

With no other true superpower (yes, China and Russia, but it is different now) to challenge us as the Ruskies did back in the day, the fact that the NWO types have seized far too much widespread control in far too many countries and with the Atheistic, secular humanist and/or amorality of one of the “main parties” we are no longer the giant among others, we are more like the one-eyed man in the land of the blind.

We have a lot.  More than any other country.  But, we had more, MUCH more as recently as five years ago.  My friends, this snowball rolling down the hill of freedom is gaining speed and power and soon, it will roll over us all.

So, for now, on behalf of myself and the imaginary Muse, I wish  you all a very Happy and Blessed Thanksgiving.  Remember as you sit with at that table on Thursday all of the things for which we still have to be thankful. But use that time to recall the things and freedoms we no longer have. And pray. 

The best CHRISTmas gift you can give your friends, family, loved ones and fellow Americans is your promise to do all that you can do to support and elect the RIGHT people in 2014 and 2016. 

Of course, more to follow.

Lastly, as mentioned, CHRISTmas is coming soon.  While I am not telling anyone where to or where not to shop, as a public service I provide to you at no additional charge the “American Family association” “Naughty and Nice List.”  What you do with it is up to you!

Again, God Bless and a Happy and Blessed Thanksgiving. +++

“Back in Black… Again”

“Opening minds and angravating liberals since 2001”

“I am a guardian of freedom and the American way of life.”

Genesis 3:19

My Friends and Fellow Goldenretrievers:

(FIRST OFF….  I have been in communication with my friend CSM William Bennett, chilling out in beautiful, downtown Afghanistan.  He thanks all for the generosity shown to him and his troops as he has received some stuff from us already.  He does ask that you PLEASE put your name and address INSIDE the package somewhere as he wishes to thank you all individually.  His address is at the end of this missive.  BTW, he particularly enjoys Partigas Maduro and Partigas #10 Cigars.  [If you wish to send those, contact me and I will direct you to the company I use that sends cigars to such places.] Thank you for your generosity.  And Thanksgiving is next week….)

I had hoped against hope that I had written the last issue on race or more accurately, racism.  Or, to use the pluperfect, to have been finished with institutional race baiting.

When Biff was first running every Liberal, and his or her cat, thought it was the greatest thing in the world that a “black” “man” was running for the Big Chair. 

Of course, like all good Libs they either did not do their homework on this sharp or ignored whatever little bit which was said, prolly accurately, against him.  But their ignorance of the facts did not sway their demands that we vote for Biff, BECAUSE he is allegedly black.

Of course, these minds of much were oblivious to the fact that their voting for someone because of their skin tone, in this case, is exactly the same as voting against someone for the same reason.

Unless you are a Liberal then facts, as Uncle Si might say, are “superstitions.” And facts get in the way of their racism and prejudices.

But we have come full circle in the past half-dozen years or so.  We have gone from the Left demanding that we vote for Biff because he is black (I mean you could not possible vote for him based on his record), to his being the smartest man of all times, and he has the Midas touch for making everything right to screwing everything up but blaming the Right and in particular Geo W for the mess Biff created to some (and in a greater  surprise, even some in the media) of the Left admitting that Biff canNOT walk on water or tie his own shoelaces to admitting to what we all have been saying all these years that he is not only a Marxist and dishonest about his past but pathological with respect to the truth to admitting that OBAMA’S OBAMACARE is a sham, a fraud, a canard and patently unworkable right back to racist.


Fifty years ago today, JFK was assassinated.  I am sure that all of us cogent on that day can recall it with great detail.  But before JFK was elected there was a great deal of concern and dare I say prejudice. 

JFK was, like your Precious is, an Irish-American Roman Catholic.  (Hyphen employed for purpose of illustration only.  I am an American, of if I must, Legal-Extra-American-American.) 

Big deal?  Back then it was!  We were about the same half-century away from signs in shops reading “Catholics Need Not Apply” or “No Irish.”  There were KKK members and officers in both Houses of the Brothel and there was a KKK member on the SCOTUS, Hugo Black.

You see, Jack’s dad, Joe, was a dirtbag, philanderer, a bootlegger and more.  In other words, he could fit in with the politicians of the day, then and now.  And he had the money to buy the election for Jack.  But, for some reason, some liked the unlikable Nixon and the Republicans played dirty for the last time. 

They claimed that if JFK was elected President that the Pope would come to our Country and rule it.  Of course, none of that was true.  First of all, the Kennedy’s were nominal Catholics at best. Second Pope John XXIII was not at all interested in America let alone running the Country as he was very busy with Vatican II.  (PLEASE do not get me started on that!)

So, the calls for voting against Kennedy because he was a Catholic are analogous to being told to vote for Biff because he is part black.

(SIDEBAR ALTAR RAIL:  The difference between the putative differences, prejudice-wise, is that JFK never demeaned any part of his heritage.  Additionally he never treated Catholics any different than anyone else and, to my knowledge, never leveraged his Catholicity for his or anyone’s benefit. Biff, on the other hand, is racist, disliked the White part of his make-up and identified with his blackness and just take a look at all the “qualified” people he put into position or to whom he gives “no bid” contracts.)

The only difference is, like him or not, Kennedy did a pretty good job and was far more Conservative than history pretends.  It was that utter disaster A’hat LBJ and JFK’s patriotically deficient brothers who have sullied his memory.

Biff on the other hand, has screwed the pooch so many times, has blamed everyone but himself and is still (and only) in his own mind the greatest president ever.

But, it is far too late for the rank and file Libs to go back to calling We the People “racists.”  Even many of them are disabused by this guy’s policies, especially since they are the “other people” who have to pay for that clusterfluke known as OBAMA’S OBAMACARE.

So, how do they deflect and diffuse We the Peoples, and now some of the media’s, attention from that which Biff hath wrought?

Institutional and corporate racism.

Yup. The Left have underestimated by orders of magnitude the intelligence of the Right and they are still reading PEOPLE magazine from the 80s and 90s.  And what are they doing?  They are rolling out (literally) the closeted lesbian, one-time Rev Wright “disciple”, big, fat racist Oprah Winfrey.

Ahhhhh…, po po po Oprah!  Her be black an all y’all!  Her be o-pressed by the White Man! This walking couch, who is worth almost THREE BILLION DOLLARS, is claiming that y’all are racist crackers.  Even if youse bees black.  (Sorry, she plays the poor black card, here is how the old poor blacks are stereotyped.)

In her addled mind, the only (or, “onlyest”, south of the Mason-Dixon Line) reason people do not love Biff is because he is black.

(And If that were to be true, we would detest him twice as much if he was 100% black….  Did she ever think we like his black side and detest his White side?  No!  That is because she is racist.  Black, White, Red, Yellow or Green, we do not like him because of his Marxist views and amoral life.  Just sayin’.)

The fact that he is racist, pro-Muslim, Anti-CHRISTian, Anti-American, is unfamiliar with the truth, less familiar than that with personal responsibility, socially tone-deaf, has made one major mistake after another and now has perpetrated the biggest con and fraud of all time, OBAMA’S OBAMACARE (He does not want his name associated with his personal Frankenstein.  Fine, I will use it twice.) has nothing to do with it, per St. Oprah.

Let’s investigate the bona fides of St. Oprah.  (And we will not speculate on her personal life.)  I am not sure of exactly what her particular talent is, where one finds her attraction and what validates her longevity. I am pretty sure that this black billionairess would not have 90%, 95% or maybe ANY of her wealth were it not for the White Wimmens what watched her show, supported her sponsors and bought whatever kind of grot and pelosi she flogged on her show.

So, how does this paragon of virtue and of all things of lightness and grace come to be such an expert on things racial? Let’s have us a look see…

In an interview on the BBC, she said “Of course the problem [of racism] is not solved. … As long as there are people who still— there’s a whole generation — I say this, you know, I said this, you know, for apartheid, South Africa, I said this for my own, you know, for my own community in the South — there are still generations of people, older people, who were born and bred and marinated in it, in that prejudice and racism, and they just have to die.”

In case you missed her tenor, she is referring to old White people.  What?  You think that there are black people who fit that description?  I am sure there are, but those are not the people St. Oprah is talking about.

Sooooooo….  When she talks about racism it is only the White people she wants dead.  Apparently the blacks are cool.

But St. Oprah is not finished yet. She had to add:  “…I think that there is a level of disrespect for the office that occurs. And that occurs in some cases and maybe even many cases because he is African American. There’s no question about that and it’s the kind of thing nobody ever says but everybody’s thinking it.”

No, you stupid, racist woman and do not DARE conflate fact with your fantasy.  (Perhaps her talent is reading minds. LOL)

I do not think the most disgusted of us have any LESS disrespect for the OFFICE of the Presidency.  But more and more of us have less use for, less trust in and less respect for the person occupying that office.

I could go on, but why bother. I will suggest that if there is anything I said untrue about St. Oprah, she is free to sue me. I fact, I demand she does.  If she does not, well, that proves m case.

So what does this president do to some racist woman who disparages all Whites as  anyone who demeans and “disrespects“ this guy but suggesting race had ANYTHING to do with his being elected?

Yes, she gets a medal.

St. Oprah, noted philanderer and thusfar unindicted sexual aggressor B.J. Clinton and fourteen others were awarded the “Presidential Medal of Freedom.”  “Mr. Cub”, Ernie Banks, prolly the best baseball player in history never to win a World Series was also honored.  After nineteen years with the Cubs, again this poor guy gets stuck some losers.

While I am canNOT adequately quantify all the good that St. Oprah and B.J. have done compared to the bad, the only thing which comes to mind that even with all their negative activity, it still does give any justification to Biff’s so-called “Nobel Peace Prize.”

Sorry, I had to write this and sorrier still that I think we may return to this topic again….

“Election 2016 – Primer #2”

“Opening minds and angravating liberals since 2001”

“I am a guardian of freedom and the American way of life.”

Genesis 3:19


My Friends and Fellow Goldenrods:


FIRST OFF… Please join me in wishing a very Happy and Blessed Birthday to my little girl!  She is so special and amazing in so many ways and is a blessing to me every day.   Daddy loves you baby!

SECOND OFF… A very dear friend has taken very ill.  Without going into much detail, I ask you to keep Brigid in your prayers.  She is the wife of another dear friend, mother of two young children and she is on a respirator.  Please keep her, Ben and the kids in your prayers.  I know they work.


Where were we???

Ahhh, yes, we were just discussing how the only people the RNC and the Roves of the party hate more than Commies, Marxists, Liberals, Progressives and garden variety Democrats are Republicans who embrace the Tea Party and those who will not knuckle under to the Party Fathers.

But, I repeat myself.

While unlikely to be widespread, you may see some Liberal defections in the next two elections with candidates not wanting to be tainted by Biff.   

That is unless you are the oxygen thief, Mr. Debbie Wassermanhyphenshultz who recently averred (paraphrasing and note double negative): “No, not the president or any Democrat has lied about anything regarding the health care bill” and “The Democrats love Obamacare and are excited to run for election in its support.”

(SIDEBAR:  Regarding his near one-hour televised tap dance on his failure, unless that is the plan all along, there was proof that the recent media disaffectation was ephemeral.  Some of the news organs [read into that as you wish] interviewed or cited “unnamed sources” et al, about “how hard that was for Biffo” and “Biffy was truly humbled” and “if you look at his face 5 years ago and today…”  I am sure that Whitey Bulger was equally humbled… So, spare me the histrionics.  Like Beretta said “Don’t to the crime if you can’t do the time.”)

In all likelihood, things being as they are, he is now toxic even with his recent mea culpa.

Where were we, Part II:

It was intimated said that the Left has and will again field candidates to siphon votes from the Republican candidate for office.  Two can play at that game.

The problem is that the Republicrats will soon have to grow a pair and not play nice.  (I have been saying this since the FISH went political.)  They take great pleasure in their moral superiority with having political minority.  A Pyrrhic Victory at best.

The Right are going to have to field candidates under the Working Families Party (they generally are neither), Communist Party, Socialist Party, Green Party, The Rent is too Damn High Party, The Where is My Free Stuff Party banners  (THAT person just might get elected!) and so on to run in Left leaning districts to marginalize their votes.

Sad, really.  For most of our history as a nation, we have had two major parties.  Yes, at times there was a third party with some muscle and of course the very minor fringe parties.  But for most of our history, for better or worse, we have had the Democrats and Republicans.

Despite how effective of a job that Dingy Harry the ELF has done keeping his pinions in check and what a terrible job Smoking Johnny has done with his charges, the mainstream of each party is not definitive for many in their ranks.

The Dems seem to cover Liberals, Working Family Party (which I suggest is neither), Socialists, Communists and others who either are benignly out for themselves or simply hate our Country.  (If you think I exaggerate, look at your recent ballot. Look at the Dem candidate and on which other lines you find his or her name.)

The Republicans heretofore have their own line and the Conservative line.  The problem is as the Dems moved more to the left, they sucked the Republicans right with them to the point that the 50/50 line is now center left and the Lefties are more “Left” than the “Right Wing” is Right of center. Capice?

Back to the point.

There are actually peeps that “caucus” with the Democrats who are self-described, ran  and were elected as Socialists.  Now, that is disturbing.  But the other side of that coin is that it exposes an Achilles Heel of the Left, as apparently they will vote for anyone.  (Exhibit A: Biff.)

Perhaps that is why there are so many more Left-wing fringe parties.

On the other side of the aisle, you have the Republicans, some masquerading as Conservatives and some that identify with the Tea Party.

What is equally disturbing as much of the above is the Bizarro Planet Logic that being a Socialist is fine and dandy while espousing the views of our Founding Fathers is heretical.

But, that is the way it is.  We canNOT say a bad word against those who live deviant lifestyles, we have to “embrace” those different from us.  At the same time we canNOT mention God, pray nor have public display of any religiosity.  No, you might get some God on you!  And the same it is with and because of politics.

It is those Left Wing Nut politicians who have altered for the worse the morals and mores of We the People.  However, we canNOT assign all of the blame to them, after all, we let them.

What did one of my fave raves say:  “The only thing needed for evil to triumph in the world is for good men to do nothing.”  By the looks at the clusterfluke our Country has become socially, it appears that good men have been working overtime doing a whole lot of nothing.

I apologize, this is one of the less coherent FISH of late, there is just so much stuff going on and none of it good.  As soon as I try to form one thought another few jump into the fray.  It appears I am Muse-less as my imaginary friend seems to be MIA.  Perhaps she went to the West Coast with me a few weeks back, stayed and headed off to Hawaii with me daughter and the family.

There is more to come, of course.  There are the weird votes, the weirder apologies, the expected denials by the Dem “leadership”, there are OBAMACARE patrol cars out on the prowl, and more and worse.

And if YOU do not start NOW to do something about it, the jig will be up for the last time.  I keep telling (the editorial) you and whole some of you are pulling out all the stops others are just rooting them on. 

I just do not understand why those who hate our Country and hate our way of life and hate our God and hate our laws do not pack up and leave and go to some godless communist workers paradise.    Oh, wait, getting a text from the Muse.

“They are not going anywhere, they want it both ways.  They know in their worker’s paradises they will have to work, their deviant life styles are not embraced, drugs are a no-no, if they act like the Occupy miscreants did they will be beaten down.”

Ok, fair enough, sounds about right to me.  But, are we just going to bend over, roll over, play dead and let them take the rest of our freedoms away?  Or are we going to find, support, campaign for and elect Americans?

The choice is yours, choose wisely.

“Election 2016 – Primer #1”

 “Opening minds and angravating liberals since 2001”

“I am a guardian of freedom and the American way of life.”

Genesis 3:19


My Friends and Fellow Goldfinches:


Let’s talk elections for a moment, shall we? Do! Let’s!

We have talked in the past about how politics is the second oldest profession in the world and is very much like the oldest except is costs way more and there is far less satisfaction.

In the good old days, if someone was running for tribunal or chief or something, if the backers of one guy thought the other guy was a threat, well, he would simply have a “chariot accident” or something funny in his peace pipe.  They just offed him.

Back in those days, there were no forensics and unless one was seen doing the deed with a smoking dagger in your hand, to mix metaphors, someone was dead that was that.

For some reason, we have stopped killing those running on the party opposite. Prolly a good thing.  But, that has not deterred the political operatives from doing all that they can to get their guy elected or, at the very least, make sure the other guy is unelectable.

Of course there are number of ways of accomplishing this.  There is negative campaigning, which, thanks largely to the Left, is status quo now. 

Funny, really, things that would have gotten a person thrown in jail not all that long ago are planks in their platform.

Take for instance the incoming Mayor of New York.  He is a Marxist (oohhhh, a REAL one, of the “I go to the Soviet Union” and “I help the Sandinistas” kind.)  Years ago, just being a Commie could land you in jail.  Going to Russia could have landed you in jail.  Going to Nicaragua could have got you in jail.  Had it been a declared war, helping the Sandinistas could have gotten you executed and so on.

On the other side of the coin, his allegedly ex-black nationalist radical lesbian wife could have had them both arrested under miscegenation laws.   But, times are different now.

But enough on William Wilhelm, or, as he goes by now, Bill de Blasio.

Sure, there were silly things, such as the guy back in the day and way up in the woods who said of his opponent “His brother is a homo sapien and his sister is a thespian! “  I think we are past that kind of silliness.

But, dirty tricks evolved and are other tricks for which to watch, but we will address this later on.

I am going to refresh your memory, if I may.

In 1908 William Howard Taft was elected.  He was somewhat popular, elected largely on the coattails of Teddy Roosevelt.  As president, Taft was his own man and he did some unpopular things to the people (income tax…. A whole ‘nother story….) and angravated business by his trust-busting.  Although, his branch of the party supported business over unions… Hmmm…

Come 1912, business and bankers – specifically the evil House of Morgan – wanted him gone.  They supported a socialist tool in the form of Woodrow Wilson.  As the race got tighter Morgan et al decided to fix the race be getting Roosevelt to run again as the Progressive Party candidate. (I think Flo was his running mate.)

The bankers not only poured tons of dough into Wilson’s coffers but did the same for Roosevelt, who thought that his backers actually liked him.

The goal was not for Roosevelt to win but to siphon enough vote from Taft in order that Good Old Socialist Wilson would win.  The rest is history.

The first dirty trick of the 2016 election was perpetrated this past Election Day.

Virginia Attorney General, Ken Cuccinelli, ran against Democrat Party hack Terry McAuliffe.  He also ran against some Libertarian tool called Robert Sarvis.  He also ran against the Republican National Committee.  He also ran against the Master Cylinder Karl Rove.  He also ran against every Republicrat out there, such as Krispie Kreme himself.

To the meat of this and to explain some of the above:

Just like in 1912, McAuliffe did NOT receive a majority of votes, but, that is nothing new.  But if the faux candidate Sarvis did not run, it is estimated that Cuccinelli wins by two points instead of losing by the same margin.

I have nothing against third parties, or, more accurately, I have no use for the current two parties.  But, unless we are to wind up as either a communist country or one of those messed up socialist (for the most part) countries with 169 parties and someone creates a coalition gov’t which lasts till the first vote.

There are ways of addressing that and we will at a later time. I just wish to deconstruct this traitorous activity a little deeper.

Point 1: As stated, Sarvis is a tool.  He knew he had no shot but there is some support for his brand of politics.  Operatives of the Maladministration bankrolled much of Sarvis’ campaign.  And like in 1912, they had no expectation that he would win and would have made sure he didn’t if all of a sudden he caught fire.  But what he did do is to siphon votes from Cuccinelli.  So, a vote for Sarvis was essentially the same as a vote for McAuliffe.  (86% of those voting for him would have voted for Cuccinelli.  This is also born out if you look at the poll tracking.)

Point 2: The RNC does not like Cuccinelli because he is his own man and he is not that interested in being controlled by the party. The RNC spent more than three times the money in the 2009 gubernatorial race where Bob McDonnell won handily.

Point 3:  Master Cylinder Karl Rove does not like Cuccinelli for the same reasons as the RNC.  Rove on election night was somewhat conciliatory to Cuccinelli then blamed him for his own defeat because of his perceived “Tea Party” views.  Here are two litmus tests:  1) If you hear Biff say something, assume the opposite is true; 2) Anyone Rove supports must be treated with great suspicion.  (Bet a dollar he backs Krispie.) 

Point 4: The Republicrats would not stump for him but you had such criminals (indicted and unindicted so far) as the Clintons and Boobberg throwing their power, name and money at McAuliffe.  Krispie was asked three times to come to the Commonwealth and lend a hand. Like St. Peter, three times he denied to go there.  You see, he did not want to be tarred by the so-called Tea Party brush.

(However, through his machinations Krispie allowed unindicted thus far former mayor of Newark, Corey Booker, get a shot to run for Senator to serve out Lautenberg’s term. You see, Krispie could have made his interim appointment last till the next election.  But, no, this way he gave the Liberals one more seat in the Senate, which is fine a’cause we have so many of them. I am disinclined to research this further as it makes no difference now but we will revisit this going forward.)

The bottom line is the party line.

I am know I am going to get some blow back on this, largely from people who throw away their votes, throw away elections and throw away YOUR liberties.   But there is principle and there is just plain common sense. 

The chances of a minor party guy winning an election are minute.  Yes, some Tea Party guys got in the “Brothel” but most of them turned out to suck out loud.  The ones who were true their platform are being vilified by the Left and disassociated by the Right.  The dirt- and other –bags in the Republicrat Party MUST be excised.  And the best way of doing that is at the grassroots level.

More on that as we go on…

But, you will see a lot of “Tea Party” and “Libertarian” and “Constitution” Party and others come out of the woodwork.  If you are familiar with your local political people as am I, and you see a name that you do not know running for something on a minor party, I am sure you will find out he is a fraud.

You can BET, no, you can be assured (betting suggest risk, there is no doubt here) that the Socialists will pull out all of the stops in 2014 and perfecting them by 2016.

Look at 2010 in Nevada.   Sharon Angle is leading Dingy Harry the ELF all during campaigning.  Then all of a sudden, voila, there is a Tea Party Candidate.   Turns out he was a stalking horse.  When you take out the pretenders for the throne and the voter fraud, Angle win the election.  (Yes voter fraud. I know!  Whoda think it!)    

Speaking of Mormons, of which Dingy is one, he is also good friends with billionaire John Huntsman, Sr.  John Huntsman is also good friends with Glenn Beck.  You would think that a man with such diverse connections would be a member of one of the clubs!  But, you would be wrong!

But, his son is.  Huntsman Junior is a member of the Council on Foreign Relations.  Oh, and ran against fellow Republicrat and Mormon, Mitt Romney.  But it was not the younger Huntsman who tipped off Dingy Harry that Mitt had not paid taxes in ten years (which was not true) but the elder Huntsman.

(Do you see why politics is like prostitution now?)               

Meanwhile on the OTHER side of the Country in Deleware, home of the dimmest person ever to hold the #2 Chair, Christine O’Donnell was running for the Republican nomination to fill JoeBama’s old seat.  She was challenged by Michael Castle, who is about the most Left of all the Republicrats.

Of course, he was the anointed one by the RNC and Rove.

However, O’Donnell had other plans and other backing, particularly from the Tea Party and she got the nomination.

During the campaign there were more accusations about O’Donnell, from stealing money to being a witch, than you could shake a stick at.  All the Liberal, Chris Coons, had to do was…. Nothing.  The Republicrats were doing all the heavy lifting to defeat their own candidate.

That is enough for now.  This will be the first installment of many, MANY more to come over the next few years.

God Help us all.

“Veteran’s Day”

“Opening minds and angravating liberals since 2001”

“I am a guardian of freedom and the American way of life.”

Genesis 3:19


My Dear Friends and Fellow Patriots:


Veteran’s Day.

I write something each Veteran’s Day and rather than just resend the last one I always tried to improve on that effort. After I wrote this one a few years ago, I came to the realization that I could not add to it. What impressed me the most is the responses that issue elicited. I received untold emails from Vets, sons and daughters of Vets and even a few guys I knew back in the day. It is heartening that you would all share your stories.


To all those who served, a Bravo Zulu, Whhuuuaaa, a Hoo-Rah and so forth and thanks.

Veteran’s Day evolved from Armistice Day, recalling the end of WWI, on the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month of 1918.

Back then we were too civilized to call it WWI, as we, the world, hoped that the “War to End All Wars” would be the last global conflict.

Silly us, as just over 20 years later a bigger war would start.

Our Country started with war, a war against the British for our Independence and in the 230+ years since then we have been involved in wars for much of our existence.

Up until the middle of the last century we were batting 1000, having not lost a war. We grew from a small, poor and weak country in the late 1700’s to defeating and re-defeating the Brits a few years later. Our Civil War, Spanish-American War and the like ensued until we got involved in WWI in the late innings. WWII saw us emerge as the world power and we became the policeman for the world.

I am not going to go cite the entire long list of other wars, skirmishes, engagements and the like, rather I wish to focus on those who fought the wars. But some introspection is required to show a commonality.

As said ours is a nation born of war and we have spent much of our time as a nation engaged in the business of war. Some of the wars were for our own preservation and, as we grew larger and more powerful, to insure or create the liberty and freedoms of other nations.

Regardless of the reasons why there is one common thread, the American Soldier, Sailor, Marine, Air Force, Coast Guardsmen and the various Reserves pressed into battle.

Some of us volunteered to serve, just like today where it is all volunteers. Other of us received the little note of “Greetings” from our Uncle Sam inviting us to a specific location for a pre-induction physical and other bits of fun. There is also a third group and those are the ones who worked in a military capacity but while in the employ of one of the various governmental agencies.

Bottom line is all who served are owed a tremendous debt of gratitude from each and every American. I suggest that all non-vets find a vet and thank him or her, and brother vets welcome each other home.

Without the bravery and valor of the men in 1776, we might still be under the Crown, ditto 1812. Our involvement in other wars, up until the world became so civilized that we were forced to number the world-wide conflicts, did more to help our allies or those in need.

In WWII, our very existence was in peril on two fronts and without the heroism and sacrifice of The Greatest Generation (a number of whom read this very little rant of mine), we might be eating Sukiyaki-Schnitzel or something to that effect.

Korea saw the first of the proxy wars, with the US taking the point of a coalition of forces aiding the South Koreans fighting against the North Koreans, and by extension the ChiComs. MacArthur was deterred (to put it mildly) from entering in to China and as a result, for better or worse, the Korean War ended in a tie. But 60 years later it is still a divided country with a live wire DMZ separating the two Koreas.

Berlin after WWII was still not a very hospitable place to be and I guess the East was so proud of their little worker’s paradise that they did not want anyone else joining in the fun that they built a wall separating the Russian Sector from the other three. (I don’t know about you, but driving from West Germany to West Berlin was always a treat for me in one way or the other and Checkpoint Charlie was the icing on the cake!)

The Cuban Missile crisis had every one on their toes and before long we were sending “advisors” to a little God-forsaken piece of real estate that few if any of us learned about in school called “Viet Nam.”

This was my war, and what a fun one it was. All the years of devising and perfecting great machines of combat were all for naught in a land for which we were ill-prepared to fight and for which our “leaders” were ill–prepared or reluctant to win.

These cute little folks from the 16th Century took advantage of our strengths and our weaknesses, both militarily and politically. (I have said time and again the loss of Vietnam can be traced to Walter Cronkite and no less a luminary as Senior General Vo Nguyen Giap of the Viet Minh and later the NVA has said as much. I do not want to get into that now and I have covered this before.)

While allegedly the Paris Peace Accords announced a tie and our troops left Saigon, the North Vietnamese reacted to the news of the withdrawal of the American Forces with the same sedate resolve and gentleness as the citizens of Detroit do when they win a basketball championship.

They stormed the joint.


And now, this very second, as we sit in our comfy chairs in our warm homes with all that we need to enjoy life, and while many tens of thousands of our fellow men and woman are being drawn in Afghanistan and are still in over 130 other countries throughout the world keeping us safe, helping others gain their freedom and keeping others safe in one manner or another.

Again, throughout our history, regardless of how one wound up in the service of our Country, irrespective of which branch we were in, we Americans have fought, been wounded, died or came home so that all the people of Our United States can live in freedom with all the wonderful things listed in the Constitution. The same Constitution to which every man and woman who has served our great Country raised their right arm and swore to God that they would support and defend. (Perhaps now some of you will see why some of us take the Constitution a bit more seriously than do others.)

While Veterans Day is not as big of a deal to most as CHRISTmas (can I still say that?) or the 4th of July or Labor Day or Easter or most any other day whose sole purpose is to increase retail sales or to enjoy a day off, I posit that it is one of THE most important holidays.

We, America, did not hire the Hessians or other mercs to wage our wars. (Yes, we did have help hither and yon, but not bought.) Our boys came from the fields, the factories, the cities and the farms and all in between to serve and protect us time and time again.

The idea of dying was always in the warriors mind. He rarely if ever spoke of it, but he knew it was there. If needed, that was part of the job. But on this day, all who served are/were warriors. Without those in support, the ground troops could not operate, even the REMF’s had their duty and for what it was worth, even if not in the sh**, they were still in the range of harm.

Later as we advanced the art of war, we were happy to have the bombers clear paths, have attack aircraft take out the local threats, have the fighters engaging those from the other side that wished to stem our successes.

Those at sea fought their opposites in the deep water or lent their support in peppering the enemy with untold numbers of shells or launching more deck-top sorties to protect those in the trenches, fox holes, elephant grass, rice paddies, sand berms or wherever.

There are far too many examples of jobs, MOS’s, Rate and Grades and so forth to honor each and every person individually. There is hardly a man or woman who has ever donned the uniform of any of the services who did not in some way contribute to the success of all of our endeavors and secure the safety and rights of all at home.

And most, I dare say, are far too modest to say what they did, what they accomplished was heroic or even out of the ordinary. It was the right thing to do at the time.

We are all reading this on our computers, taking for granted how the thoughts of one person can get from his fingers, through the ether and wind up on their computer screen. We turn on our computer and it is just there. We do not think of the technology involved to create this magic, we just take it for granted.

We are all reading this on our computers, taking for granted that we do not have to hide to read this, that there are not skirmishes in the street, that our electricity is on, we have food to eat and a government that was freely elected.

Today and every day but especially today, do not take that for granted. For none of that would be possible without the sacrifice in each and every way of each and every veteran.

If you are a religious person, perhaps this might be a good day to attend a service or at the very least say a prayer for all who have served and are serving this minute. If you are not religious then keep them close to your heart in a positive way.

If you have any vets in your family, neighborhood or work, do something nice for them. After you finish thanking them perhaps you can do something nice. Take him or her out to lunch or dinner, if you are in a bar, buy them a drink and tell them that their sacrifice is appreciated and job well done.

If you can read this, thank a teacher

If you can read this in English, thank a vet.



I am John and I approve this message!

Be strong, keep the faith and pray. (While you can.)

God Bless





“The Letter”

 “Opening minds and angravating liberals since 2001”

“I am a guardian of freedom and the American way of life.”

Genesis 3:19


My Friends and Fellow Goldbars:


Some of you may have seen this letter circulated on the internet.  In my curiosity and quest for accuracy, I checked into it.  I located the writer, commended her for being so brave and asked permission to reprint this.

This young lady from Palmer, Texas took the time to craft this letter which has by now gone somewhat viral.  I wonder how many of us feel as does she. I wonder how many of us have the intestinal fortitude to write something this damning.

For years I have been asking extolling, cajoling, begging you to do all that you can to make our Country whole again, back to the way it used to be.  Even the bad old days were far better than these!

Now, not every one of you checks in with me, and not all of you agree with me.  Both are fine.   I do hear from a fair number of you who have done something special, over and above or simply made a donation to a worthy entity.  From the number of contacts I get on various items, I am proud to say that the statistical model suggests that you are far more active and far more generous than the average.  In fact you exceed expectations even after removing liberals from the equation.

In other words, youse are good eggs.

I am not asking you to do anything special.  I am not asking you to go to the well.  If you are led, you will do what is in your heart, whatever that may be. 

I want you to read the letter below. (No, Ben, not scan over it but read it.)  I would be surprised if most of you have not had to face one of these challenges and I would wager that there may be some of you that have faced them all, and if possible, more.

What is poignant is that she does an amazing job in not making any ad hominem attacks, there is nothing with which anyone could deny and she makes a good case.

There are three sad parts. 

The first and most obvious is that she is in this condition.  The second is that she is not alone and getting more company every day. 

But the third thing is the one that strikes me as the saddest.  She feels that she has been let down, perhaps slammed down, by the gov’t.  Note, that she is not asking for rent money, food stamps a free phone or anything.  (From the tone of her letter, I do not get the sense that she receives any assistance.)  She is just a mom, a regular person like you or me who is at her breaking point.  (And STILL she gives to others out of her need.)

I am not going to post any contact info here or now but if you want to contact her for any reason, best send me an email. 

So, take a deep breath and get into a quiet place for about 2 minutes and read this.


Dear President Obama, 

I wanted to take a moment to say thank you for all you have done and are doing. You see I am a single Mom located in the very small town of Palmer, Texas. I live in a small rental house with my two children. I drive an older car that I pray daily runs just a little longer. I work at a mediocre job bringing home a much lower paycheck than you or your wife could even imagine living on. I have a lot of concerns about the new “Obamacare” along with the taxes being forced on us Americans and debts you are adding to our country. I have a few questions for you Mr. President.

Have you ever struggled to pay your bills? I have.

Have you ever sat and watched your children eat and you eat what was left on their plates when they were done, because there wasn’t enough for you to eat to? I have.

Have you ever had to rob Peter to pay Paul, and it still not be enough? I have.

Have you ever been so sick that you needed to see a doctor and get medicine, but had no health insurance because it was too expensive? I have. 

Have you ever had to tell your children no, when they asked for something they needed? I have.

Have you ever patched holes in pants, glued shoes, replaced zippers, because it was cheaper than buying new? I have.


Have you ever had to put an item or two back at the grocery store, because you didn’t have enough money? I have. 

Have you ever cried yourself to sleep, because you had no clue how you were going to make ends meet? I have. 

My questions could go on and on. I don’t believe you have a clue what Americans are actually going through and honestly, I don’t believe you care. Not everyone lives extravagantly. While your family takes expensive trips that cost more than most of us make in two-four years, there are so many of us that suffer. Yet, you are doing all you can to add to the suffering. I think you are a very selfish and cold hearted man, who does not care what is best for the people he was elected by (not by me) to represent, but more so out for the glory of your name attached to history. So thank you Mr. President, thank you for pushing those of us that are barely staying afloat completely under water and driving America into the ground. You have made your mark in history, as the absolute worst and most hated president of the United States.


God have mercy on your soul! 
Yolanda Vestal
Average American

“7 Of….”

“Opening minds and angravating liberals since 2001”

“I am a guardian of freedom and the American way of life.”

Genesis 3:19


My Friends and Fellow Goldfarbs:



“Yes, we are the Johnsons!”

“Very well, come this way…. Thank you for appearing today.”

“Well, we were told to be here.  Can you tell us why?  The message seemed odd, especially bringing all the children on a school day!”

“Trust me, the children won’t miss any school.  So you are a Party Member…”

“Yes, both of us, especially after Hillary won!  Isn’t that wonderful!  Our first female president!  Truly, I could just cry.”

“You may save that for later.  In any event, you both a Party Members?

“Yes, and we…”

“You did vote for Madame President?”

“Why yes!  Of course! And we…”

“Well, good for you.  And you did receive this packet of questions a few weeks ago, read it, filled it out, signed it and returned it to us?”

“Yes, why…”

“Are these your signatures?”

“Yes, of course, that is mine and…”

“And you realize that your signature indicate that you read the information above and agree to all of the stipulations?”

“Of course we agree, after all it is Hillary! And maybe we did not get a Philadelphia lawyer to go over it, we looked at it, the opening bits for sure and glanced over the rest.”

“Sort of like the way the Congress back in in 2010 went over St. Obamacare. Hehhehheh.”

“Doctor, without being rude, may  ask why are we here?  And, now that I think of it, why are we seeing a doctor?  We both are well as are all of the boys!”

“Yes, yes, yes.  Four strapping boys.  And they seem so well behaved!”

“Well, we try.  We want to provide model citizens for the party and here are four amazing examples.”

“Yes, of course.   Now one more time, you both read the document you signed, which I must alert you to the fact that it is a legally binding document, yes?”

“Yes, of course!  We would do ANYTHING for Hillary, I am sorry, for Madame President.  Anything, we adore her!”

“Anything… hmmm…  Sorry drifted for a moment. So therefore we can surmise that based on the fact that you read over the document, signed it and agree to all of its clauses and codicils and that it is irrevocable?”

“Yes, we as we said, we love Madame President and St Obama.  We would do anything for the party!”

“I want to be as fair as I can.  I am authorized to give you a chance to change your mind, take the contract and walk away as if nothing happened.  If you do that, there will be no negative information put in your files but this is the one and only opportunity you will offered to walk away.”

“No, we are fine with whatever is in there. St. Obama did all he could for the folks.  We both voted for him all four times.  We would have voted for him again, except…”

“There, there, no reason to cry, it is all good!  We have Madame President to lead us now!  Ok, so that settles it, we can put the seal on this file and you both will sign it with the understanding that you will be legally bound to the contents therein?”

“Yes, of course, anything for the Party!”

“Fair enough, if the both of you will sign here… and here…  good, now on to business.”


“Yes, of course, business.”

“What kind of business?”

“Why, Madame Presidents Business of course!  But first, what are the names of your boys?”

“Jimmy is the oldest, then William, who we call Bill, you can guess why, then John Al, we had a hard time with that name, and the little one, Barrack.”

“Impressive!  You have honored the party by naming the children after our presidents and contenders!  Tell me, which ones are your favorites?”

“Oh….. we love them all the same!”

“I am sure you do. But you must have favorites, either one or one each.  I mean, you may like music and Dick may like sports, so it would be natural for you to favor the most musically inclined and your partner to favor the athlete.”

“Well… when you put it like that I do like music and Bill has shown an interest in the flute.”

“And I think that Jimmy has the most athletic prowess. Then again, he IS the oldest, I am sure that as time goes on the others will learn their chops.”

“Er, of course. I appreciate your candidness.  So Lotta, you see Bill as a favorite and Dick, you think that Jimmy is the best athlete, yes?””

“Yes, what difference does it make? I am sure that as time goes on, those talents may change from boy to boy…”

“Er, yes…  So, as we speak, on the totem pole of your boys Bill and Jimmy are at the top of the heap and..”

“Well, they are the oldest. As I said, I am sure that as time goes by, the talents of the other bro…”

“Yes, indeed… So again, just so we are on the same page, you did read the Party position paper, you signed it, you had the opportunity to renege you declined, and you re-affirmed your fealty to Madame President, yes?”

“Of course but what does that have to do with…..hey, why are those nurses taking John Al and Barrack?  Where are they taking them? Why? No, really, what is going on here?”

“You read or at the very least agreed that you read the Party platform, and…”

“What does that have to do with where our boys…”

“You signed that and had the opportunity to renege, …”

“But we did not, we are good Party Members!”

“Yes, of course.  And you will then recall St. Obama’s dedication to women’s health.  You both claim to be very pro-choice, per your documents, yes?”

“Of course!  We volunteer at Planned Parenthood and contribute to Emily’s List.”

“You will recall, then, when St. Obama extended the window for woman’s health choice till not just birth, not just a week, not even a month but up until a year after the delivery of a fetus.”

“Yes, we recall.”

“And you supported woman’s choice up until the fetus’s first anniversary of exiting the womb?”

“Yes, but…”

“And you signed the Party platform which decreed that per Madame President, Party members are limited to two children only and that…”

“WHAT!!!! We did not see THAT? We would NEVER agree to that, we…”

“But you did, you agreed to it when you first signed the packet and you were given at least two opportunities to back out but neither of you did and you both resigned and we have this entire transaction on video.”

“What are you talking about?  What transaction?”

“You agreed to abide by the Amendment for Women’s Health Rights. Madame President has mandated that the Party faithful will not have more than two children.”

“WHAT????  Won’t have more than two children? But we have four! And they were all born before Madame President was elected.”


“And what?  My kids, our kids were born before this rule, which we support for other people!”

“Madame President has been very clear on this matter, two children only an after all, you signed the packet within was the limitations of the transaction.”

“What transaction?”

“The one where you agreed to be bound to all new bills or laws ex post facto.”

“Transaction?  Limited to two children? What are you talking about? Where are John Al and Barrack?”

“My dear, I am pleased to advise you their suffering is over, we have…”

“Sufffering? What suffering they are fine. You saw them when they were here just a …”

“I can assure you, they did not suffer. The ….”

“Suffer?  SUFFER? What are you talking about? They are fine!”

“My dear, they are at rest.  You agreed and swore to uphold the law of the Madame President.  You will be allowed to view them before you must leave.”


“Calm down, it is far too late. You sealed their fate when you walked in. I gave you two chances to change your mind but you had too much faith in your leader. And now you must stand up for your beliefs!”

“But, we did not read the papers and we are Party Members, we thought we would be rewarded and the Republicans would be rightfully punished!”

“In time, but Madame President wishes to set a standard, to set an example.  This conversation we are having is happening thousands of times today and going forward.  Oh, you DID read the part for the penalty for revealing what happened during this interview?”

“No we…”

“I assure you, think the worst.  Think Chris Stevens…

“You wouldn’t!  They wouldn’t! SHE wouldn’t!”

“I would, we would and not only would she, it is her idea. It would not be her first time at the rodeo.”’

“My God, what have we done!”

“My what?  There is no god! Are you really an enemy of the state?!”

“NO, NO, NO, it is just an old term from before the Great Purge.  There is no lord but Madame President.  There was no lord before her but St. Obama.”

“OK, that is better.  As you know our Madame President supports all rights for gay people.”

“Yes, as do we!”

“And you know that one of the reasons Madame President put the “Fair and Balanced Family Act” into law so that we will no longer procreate and populate as we did before.  Of course, this is for our friends the Muslims and other catch up to our numbers.”

“Yes, of course, we support that! Long live Madame President!”

“The next step is to reproduce at a rate lower than replenishment after all not to allow our friends from the Middle East to catch up would be…”

“Racist.  Yes, we know, we agree.”

“So, which one is going to federal homosexual re-education, Jimmy or Bill?”



OK, laugh. Tell me I am crazy.   Tell me this could never happen.  And you will be surprised, I will agree with you if and only if you can tell me ONE thing this Maladministration has done to convince you this could never happen.


(LASTCALLBAR: Imagine if once a woman was pregnant she had to name her baby and had to refer to that life in her belly by that name?  I wonder….)